My Top 13 Lessons From Our First Year of Homeschooling

You’ve heard it said before that homeschooling is not for the weak of heart. Well, it’s true. There were many days in that first year that I questioned if I was doing the right thing. But then, somewhere in the middle of the year, it all just clicked. We found our groove. We were soaring! From then on, it was crystal clear that this was the right path for our family and we absolutely fell in love with homeschooling!

I am not a seasoned homeschooling mom. I do not have years of experience under my belt. One thing I do have is a year’s worth of mistakes and accomplishments, all leading to 13 significant lessons that I learned in our first year. Lessons that we will carry with us throughout our journey.

If you are interested in homeschooling, I invite you to read through some of these and I hope that they will offer some encouragement on your beautiful journey ahead! Be ready for some excitement, some tears, some big “aha” moments, lots of laughter, and a whole lot of growth!

So, I’ll get right to it. If you’re considering homeschooling, here are the TOP 13 LESSONS that I learned in our first year:

Quicklist:

Be Ready for ALL the Feelings
Give Yourself Time to Find Your Rhythm
Find Support – Follow a Homeschooling Mom Group
Get Outside
Let Go of Rigidity and Perfectionism
Be the Teacher AND the Student
Take the Time to Discover Your Child’s Strengths and Weaknesses
There’s an Endless Supply of Free or Low-Cost Educational Resources
I Needed a Structured Curriculum
We Needed a Designated School Space
Check Your State Laws and Umbrella Schools
Think Thrifty to Meet School Space Needs
Prepare Yourself for the Judgement

Now Let’s Explore Each of Them a Little More….

Be Ready for ALL the Feelings: If there was one thing that made me almost give up on homeschooling in the first year, it was this overwhelming feeling that I’m just not fun anymore. You see, homeschooling doesn’t magically transform your kid into a little person that sits down and does what you say. We know that, right? And because it’s you, they will likely be even more prone to seeing how far they can push back. In the beginning, we had so many days where my kiddo would complain (that’s putting it nicely) and I began to feel like I was tarnishing our relationship. But then, somewhere in the middle of the year, we found a rhythm (I’ll talk about that next). The bad days became fewer and fewer and suddenly we were getting excited together over things he was learning and big accomplishments! We still have bad days here and there, and honestly, we sometimes take a day off or find a way to get outside on those days, but for the most part, we have found our groove and we love it now! So, don’t give up if at first it feels uncomfortable, frustrating, or sad. You’ll likely experience all the feels in your first year and that also includes excitement, growth, happy tears, pride, and joy!

Give Yourself Time to Find Your Rhythm: I read somewhere that the early years of homeschooling are about focusing on finding a groove, or a rhythm. Getting your kid used to what’s expected when you are in homeschooling-mode is a new thing for them (and you). If you read my note above about being ready for all the feelings, you already know that this finding the rhythm took us half the year! Not even joking. It was total trial and error and we had to just keep pushing through until I found what worked for us. Sometimes it’s the simple things like mornings are more productive than afternoons, alternating paperwork and readings keeps him interested, and certain subjects should always come first in the day because he finds them less interesting and tends to complain more if he’s tired by the time we get to them. Other things took more time and effort, like piecing together a designated school space, finding and/or creating tools of learning that he enjoyed, and learning to let go of the rigid mindset that anything was set in stone. We’ll talk about each of these in a bit, but the most important thing to remember is that every kid is different, every parent is different, and every homeschooling journey will be different. It will take time to find your rhythm, but remember to give yourself, and your kid, some grace as you are finding that groove. You’ll get there!

Find Support – Follow a Homeschooling Mom Group: Feed your heart and soul with the encouragement of others and you will find it easier to push through those times when you question yourself!

There will inevitably be days when you question it all! Am I doing the right thing? Am I any good at this? Am I actually hurting our relationship? Why do I feel so frustrated? Trust me…these are all perfectly normal feelings. How do I know this? Because I joined several homeschooling mom groups on Facebook and found that homeschooling moms everywhere were expressing these exact same feelings and questions. You’ll have highs and lows throughout the journey, but you’ll find lots of support and encouragement through these groups. I have wonderful non-homeschooling friends and family (love you guys so much!), but these moms had been there and they knew what I felt, how I questioned myself, and how I doubted myself. They also knew how to help me push through it and it gave me some comfort to know that they had been through it as well. And guess what? These moms all have different experiences, different journeys, and different opinions! It’s a wonderful collection of support from people who share a common goal: To find a homeschooling path that fits our family, our needs, and our lifestyle. A path that fills our hearts while educating our children.

Get Outside: This one is pretty simple and straightforward, but so important! Sometimes, the more we tried to push through something, the more challenging it would get and we would feel frustrated and burnt out. We needed fresh air! So, we would go for a walk or play in the backyard and hit the reset button. Maybe take a nap afterwards and finish the project the next day! My favorite homeschooling days are when we pack a lunch, a blanket, and a few schoolbooks and head out in search of green grass, a daisy field, a river or a park and we sit and knock out some schoolwork while soaking up the sunshine and then finish the afternoon by playing! Even now, after getting in the habit of taking a break to get outside, sometimes I’m still surprised by what a mood-lifter a little walk can be, for me and my little guy! So, when we feel frustrated, exhausted, or burnt out, we remember to get outside!

Let Go of Rigidity and Perfectionism: It all started with a book. A book in the curriculum that my kid (and my husband, and even myself, if I’m honest) really disliked reading (that’s putting it nicely). But I made us all push through it, chapter by chapter, night after night because… we have to read it because it’s in the curriculum, right? Not necessarily. Many homeschooling moms will tell you that the curriculum is a suggested route and deviations are allowed, even encouraged, as necessary, as long as you accomplish the same goal. So, we reached out to a friend that sells books and found a similar book to dive into, but one that we all enjoyed! Everyone has different opinions on this, but one of the things that I have come to love about homeschooling is the freedom to change things up. I’m all for teaching my kid persistence and that not everything that must be done will be fun, but sometimes it’s okay to change things up! There will be weeks that you don’t finish everything on the schedule. There will be books that you just can’t seem to get through. There will be recommended ways of teaching subjects that just don’t work well for your kid(s). That’s okay AND normal. And that is the beauty of homeschooling. We have the power to change things and give our kids exactly what they need. So, don’t let rigidity and perfectionism make you feel like a failure. Embrace your child’s differences and carve a path unique to you! So, when you feel led to hold on to this idea of rigidity, remember to….

Be the Teacher AND the Student: One of the most amazing benefits of homeschooling is that we don’t have to stick with one way of learning if it’s just not working for our kid. We can adjust and adapt so that they have every opportunity to learn and enjoy the lesson. If a certain way of doing something is confusing or frustrating, take a moment to reconsider your approach. Ask your kid, ask other parents, or do some additional research. There are so many options out there.

Take the Time to Discover Your Child’s Strengths and Weaknesses: Because I took the time early on to hone in on our kid’s strengths and weaknesses, I was able to add in learning activities that helped him in these areas. With homeschooling, we can adjust and adapt based on our kid’s needs, but we have to take the time to understand them.

I noticed early on that my kiddo was struggling with language arts and excelling at mathematics (he doesn’t get the math from me)! Every kid is unique and those were his strengths and weaknesses. Because I honed in on these early on, I was able to incorporate more days and activities where we focused on language arts to help him strengthen his skills. We still followed the curriculum provided by Sonlight, but we added (a lot!) of games, flashcards, activities, and almost made it a daily thing where we spent at least a few minutes on some sort of language arts skill set. It made a HUGE difference by the end of the year. On the flip-side, seeing that he was excelling at mathematics, I added in activities that were more challenging for him in that department…and he loved it! When you are looking for additional resources, remember….

There’s an Endless Supply of Free or Low-Cost Educational Resources: After the Covid-19 worldwide pandemic, many of us know that there are free and/or low cost educational resources on the internet, but if you don’t, I’m here to fill you in on a huge secret: Websites like https://fromabcstoacts.com/, https://www.teacherspayteachers.com/, and https://www.education.com/ offer free and low cost educational printouts, worksheets, and more. For young learners, Walmart and Amazon have lots of inexpensive workbooks that you can pick up around the start of the school year. Local libraries often carry many of the resources that you may need or find useful and are a popular favorite with homeschooling families. I actually enjoy creating a lot of our own resources, games, and activities. If we find that a homemade resource is fun and successful, l upload them on our blog website under the “Downloads” tab. For instance, this year I designed Alphabet Bingo cards and we had several fun and memorable Bingo nights after dinner! Hello, educational family game time…win, win!! So, if you are looking for additional educational resources, utilize your homeschooling mom group connections and reach out! I can almost guarantee you that someone will have a suggestion for whatever you are looking for!

I Needed a Structured Curriculum: There are a lot of homeschooling families that create their own curriculum from scratch! This is the epitome of amazing to me! But, since I’m a newbie homeschool mom, I needed a structured curriculum to start with. That’s one of the reasons that I fell in love with the Sonlight program. They literally send you a schedule (4-day or 5-day, your choice) that breaks down what schoolwork should be done each day from week 1 to week 36, plus all of the books needed to complete the schoolwork assigned. For a first-timer like me, that was a HUGE relief! It settled many of my fears of failure knowing that if I just follow the schedule, we can’t fail. I loved it! We loved it! We have learned to adapt where needed, but we still enjoy having structured curriculum to start with.

We Needed a Designated School Space: We all have to adapt and adjust our idea of “homeschooling space” based on the layout of our home and our every day lifestyle, but when focus was waning, we either went outside or we used our designated school space!

We started out the school year at the dining room table. While many families find this the perfect setup, our books were floating all over the house, distractions were coming up left and right, and I found it much harder to focus, much less ask my little person to focus. This space just wasn’t working for us. I decided to find a space in our house that we could dedicate as our “homeschooling area” and set it up accordingly. I worked for two days to get everything in its place. It was like magic! His focus improved greatly, leading to better listening and retention. I could find everything that I needed and put everything back in its place at the end of every day. Because this was our designated school space, when we walked in there, we knew that it was time to work and both of us were able to get into that headspace!

We Still Make Room for Flexibility: I leave a blanket on the floor in the loft so that we can work on the floor or at the desk, depending on what he would like. We also have a desk on the back porch so that we can have breakfast and do schoolwork while listening to the bird’s chirp, if we wish. So, this “designated school space” isn’t a rigid idea.

Check Your State Laws and Umbrella Schools: I do not claim to be knowledgeable about the different laws concerning homeschooling. They vary greatly based on which state that you reside in. If you are considering homeschooling, you definitely want to familiarize yourself with the laws and options in your state. Here in Colorado, as of this article date, we have the option of homeschooling under an umbrella company. It’s not the only option for homeschooling, but one that we are considering, based on its benefits. So, what is an umbrella company? I found this article very helpful: CLICK HERE. Whatever you choose, my advice is just to make sure that you do some research and know how to stay in compliance with your state laws and the pros and cons of each option available to you.

Think Thrifty to Meet School Space Needs: Instagram and Pinterest offer so many peeks inside other homeschooling classroom spaces and they are often incredible! Budget-wise, however, they aren’t always realistic (at least not for us). So, I started making a list of our at-home school space must-haves. Over the course of the year, the list grew and included things like a globe, microscope, school desk, something to hold crayons, pens/pencil/marker organizers, pencil sharpener, clipboards, 3-hole punch, printer, computer, bookshelf, laminator, cardstock, flat marbles (for math), and more! Thinking thrifty, I started checking thrift stores, Facebook Marketplace, garage sales, and antique stores, while keeping my growing list in the back of my head. I found a globe for $5 at a garage sale. A local private school listed leftover school desks for FREE (and in great condition)! I made a bookshelf out of a dresser that I found at the thrift store. We found flat marbles and pencil/coloring pencil/marker organizers at the Dollar Tree for $1 each! While shopping at an antique store, we picked up an old wooden toolbox with a handle and it works perfectly to hold all of the crayons that we move around the classroom (plus it’s super farmhouse cute)! The point is that you can build a great classroom out of thrifty finds. My recommendation is that you let your friends and family know what you are looking for since things like this tend to go pretty fast. You may find that you have built yourself a great little classroom with a very small financial investment in no time at all!

And Lastly…

The ugly. I’m sorry. I didn’t want to add this, but if I’m being honest, it’s one of the big things that I learned during my first year as a homeschooling mom….

Prepare Yourself for the Judgement: This is a hard one for me. I would love to be all butterflies and rainbows about homeschooling because we LOVE IT so much, but that would not be honest. I wish I could go back and tell myself to be ready for the judgement.

I walked into homeschooling with a tremendous amount of excitement. Nerves too, but mostly excitement! I won’t go into the reasons why we chose to homeschool, but as a family unit, we decided that it works best for our family, our kiddo, and our lifestyle, but mostly it works best for our kiddo. He thrives as a homeschooler and he loves it!

I quickly learned, however, that when you choose to homeschool, you become the target of a lot of judgmental comments. It was unexpected because I’ve never been one to judge friends based on if they chose daycare, public school, private school, etc. You know what’s right for your family, in my opinion, and that’s what’s important. Therefore, I didn’t anticipate and prepare myself for the judgement that would be directed at me. I was surprised by how many friends, acquaintances, and even strangers started expressing their very outspoken, and often negative, opinions of our decision to homeschool and “the socialization impacts it would have on our child.”

In the end, it was a big lesson for me. Being a mom often means growing a thick skin and not allowing the judgement of others to derail you when you are following a path that you feel is best for your family. Remember, in the end, we don’t have to prove anything to anyone here. So, say your prayers, ask God for guidance, have an open conversation with your family, and then follow your heart and do what you feel is the best for your own little family unit.

Love each other. Love God. And enjoy this beautiful journey that you have in front of you!

Many blessings from our homeschooling family to yours…. Xoxo!